Sad news today about Dick Clark.  My personal Dick Clark eulogy is about his bathroom.  I went to his house in Malibu in 1996 when the NAB Convention was in LA, and ABC was holding a party there one night.  The house was Mid-Century Modern (meaning it was modern in the 1970’s) and was right on the beach.

Dick asked me if I’d like a tour of the house.  Sure.  He walked me through all the rooms, pointing out pictures of him with a zillion different stars of music, radio and TV.  All of the decorations were done by his wife, Kari.  Except…for the downstairs bathroom.  Dick designed that himself.  100%.  Would I like to see it?  Absolutely.

The bathroom was white tile like you see in a subway station.  Not a clean one like the Paris Metro, but a dirty one like in the Bronx.  With broken tiles and graffiti spray paint saying, “America’s Oldest Teenager” and “We aim to please so please aim” and “Dick peed here.”  He also had a tinny speaker in the ceiling with a tape with announcing “Number 7 train for Queens.”   The piece de resistance was a metal stall like you’d see in a public restroom with a door that didn’t shut completely.  He asked me if it wasn’t the coolest bathroom I’d ever seen.  Yes, it was.

The house was later demolished and replaced with one that looks exactly like The Flintstones house. Rock walls and all. You can buy it for 3.5.

For now, Dick Clark, so long.